The Importance of the RSVP in Business Socializing Situations
There is absolutely no worse business faux pas than to show up for a gathering to which you have not sent your RSVP. In social situations, this is embarrassing, but in the business world, its downright catastrophic. Theres simply nothing worse than showing up for an event and not having a spot secured. In the business world, this can be doom for your career. Theres no spot for you at any of the tables, no pre-made folder with all the conference information or a handy nametag with your info on it.
While none of these problems sound like a too serious infringement on the rules of society, in the business world, its the equivalent of showing up two hours late for a business meeting. All of the other members of the meeting have gone back to their offices and moved on to new work. It was rude when you didnt show up for the meeting on time and didnt let anyone know, but its absolutely disastrous to pull them back out of their offices and their work for take two. Its the business equivalent of saying My time is much more valuable than your time is, so Im going to waste yours. In the modern business world, its just not done. Unless, of course, you are so far above the rest of the crowd that you can get away with it, but if thats the case, then you probably have two or three really good PAs, and the RSVP would never slip through the cracks and not get sent.
Organizers of business events carefully plan everything from the amount of materials needed, to the size of the room reserved, to the amount of lunches being ordered from catering. All of these details go through a careful planning process, and while there are probably an extra folder or two of materials floating around and one more person is not going to change the fire safety regulations simply by adding one extra person. However, the underlying notion of disrespect for the time and energy of the organizing body is a faux pas not quickly recovered from. If you are planning on attending an event and realize that you forgot to send the RSVP, telephone the office and express your regrets. If theres extra space, you will be graciously admitted and you should show your appreciation for this gesture. If your apology is accepted, but no invitation is extended, you will know that you have to wait for next years event and remember to send in the card that time.
On the other hand, when you are unable to attend an event; business code requires that you send back the RSVP card with your regrets. This is just as much a planning element as sending back your card saying that you will, indeed, attend an event. Event organizers sometimes plan events based on the number of people who attended last year, and if there is a significant number who cannot attend, it is good form to make this known well in advance. Not having enough space for participants is embarrassing, but having too much empty space is also embarrassing. Both extremes are best avoided whenever possible.
The bottom line is that the business world requires just a little bit more formal communication than regular society seems to agree is norm nowadays. Business is retaining some of its distance and formalism even as common rules of decorum disappear from general society. What your mother would require proper social manners is what the business world still demands.
